More tales of the White Buffalo

I was thinking about how the various talking heads all have their little media schtick and what mine would be. I was debating the various merits of narcolepsy vs Tourette’s Syndrome, which had the effect of reminding me of one of the most debilitating impressions I have ever seen in my life.

We were at the Digital Ghetto, playing NBA Live on the Playstation upstairs on the rattiest old yellow couch you can possibly imagine. The White Buffalo had the Denver Nuggets, for some reason that I can’t possibly explain, and I was up by six points or so when he passed the ball to his guard, Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf.

I made the mistake of saying “hey, isn’t he the guy with Tourette’s?” The WB simply nodded and knocked down a two-pointer. However, the next time Abdul-Rauf touched the ball, he barked this explosive obscenity combined with an spastic jerk of his head and an immediate launch of the basketball. I started cracking up, and every time I’d get it under control, he’d pass the ball to Abdul-Rauf again, who was knocking down threes even as his Tourette’s was getting increasingly out of hand.

By the end of the game, I was collapsed on the couch, laughing helplessly, as the White Buffalo was swearing up a storm and driving Mahmoud in for uncontested layups. Needless to say, I got crushed.

I wonder if the folks at Unity would find this story endearing? Okay, probably not. Maybe I’ll just make a practice of telling the host I’m not wearing any underwear. That went over pretty well at the party the Perfect Aryan Male’s law firm held to welcome him to the firm… but that’s a story for another time.

Mailvox: he’s not supporting himself

An officer in Iraq writes:


I hadn’t heard of OpenOffice until you recently mentioned it in your blog. Thanks for bringing it up. I installed it and it works great. I also read in your blog the entry entitled The Darkness Spawns More Evil regarding Windows XP and Linux. How user friendly is Linux for a home system belonging to someone that is not a computer expert (such as myself)? For the average home computer user, is it worth the switch?

On a different subject, I wanted to let you know that I tune in daily to the blogspot. Out here in the desert I’ve got a lot of time on my hands to read, and your site is one of my favorites. Count me, as well as a few fellow officers that will listen to me, in as converts to libertarian principles. I can’t believe I was blinded for so long. By the way, that Marine Major’s statement about supporting the troops equals supporting the mission is totally absurd. Obviously, some of us know better. We are the ones who get out of the service as soon as our commitment ends (if they let us re: stop loss orders) I and several other officers in our battalion, are headed for the door.

Linux, as in Fedora Core 2, works very well as a home system except for its home networking capabilities. I haven’t been able to get it working at all; it’s even less functional than Fedora Core 1, with which I could at least access my Windows machines via SMBCLIENT. Big Chilly reports that Mandrake does a very nice job with setting up all the networking stuff, though, and I’m planning to check it out once I wrap up a few more pressing projects.

I’m not in the least bit surprised to hear this officer ridicule the major’s statement, as I’ve heard from plenty of Marines, soldiers and sailors who have their doubts about the mission. Their professionalism allows them to get the job done and get it done right, but they do not make the mistake of confusing themselves with the mission. After all, their oath is to the Constitution, not to the whims of the Commander-in-Chief.

The fact that high-ranking career officers would rather retire than continue serving at the beck and call of the present administration is one of the more damning cases that one can make against the manner in which George Bush has handled his responsibilities as their commmander. No doubt they were expecting much better after being forced to suffer through Bill Clinton’s stewardship.

On a tangential note, does it amaze anyone else that our soldiers are able to remain in such close contact with the home front? I mean, one of my friends in my fantasy football league is back in Iraq again! Not that that will stop us from questioning his manhood and mocking him mercilessly whenever he loses, of course, although we have reluctantly agreed to cut him some slack on roster deadlines and so forth if his commanding officer will provide him with a signed note that he was too busy shooting at people to get his lineups straight.

Kerry to quit

I don’t have any evidence for this, it’s just a feeling I have as the Vietnam evidence against him snowballs. Krazy John wasn’t able to respond effectively to the first Swiftvet charges, and that’s turned out to be just an opening jab that prepared the public for what will likely be a knockout punch, his baseless testimony on war atrocities that was used against US POWS by the North Vietnamese. As more and more people discover the particulars of his meeting with the North Vietnamese and Viet Cong in 1970 as part of his protest effort, even die-hard Democrats will abandon him.

Democrats, more than most, love front-runners. Once Kerry starts to visibly slip, they will turn on him with all the ferocity of the unthinking rodents that they are at heart. They don’t actually like Kerry, and remember, another Massachusetts liberal was leading another Bush by 17 points prior to the Republican coronation. By November, he was absolutely destroyed in a historic rout. And Willie Horton and the infamous tank-driving episode don’t pack one-tenth the punch that Kerry’s cumulative Vietnam debacle will.

Remember, too, that Whackjob is an exceptionally and unusually proud man. He doesn’t fall, he assures us even as we see him getting up from the snow. He doesn’t fail. He is too proud to be willing to get crushed – crushed – by a mediocrity such as George W. Bush, and too self-centered to give a damn about what his late pull-out will do to his party. The only way that Kerry can salvage his bizarre view of himself is to declare himself too noble for the dirtiness of modern politics and end his campaign. He won’t have failed, it was the system, the vets, the Republican attack dogs, etc, anyone but him.

Edwards would cheerfully leap in and play sacrificial lamb, in order to give himself a leg up for the nomination in 2008. But as one veteran trader, who was the first to suggest this possibility to me, has pointed out, Kerry will have to quit in mid-September for Edwards to participate in the first debate. Interestingly enough, the POW documentary starts in two weeks….

It’s just speculation at this point, but there is a certain compelling logic to the concept.