Fading away

John Podhoretz writes on NRO:

Here’s my very short take on the matter, after decades as a baseball fanatic. Anybody who cares one whit about this sport any longer is a sap — a lovable sap, a sentimental sap, maybe. But a sap. Look at the facts. The records of the last decade were all drug-induced. The man who was supposedly the greatest player in the history of the game is now mysteriously injured forever — probably because he can’t get out of bed in terror of that grand jury indictment coming down the pike that will accuse him straightforwardly of being a cheater. And not even a pleasant cheater either. Meanwhile, now that nobody’s taking the drugs any longer the league rankings and ratings have gone totally screwy, and basically, the biggest star in the majors is a 75 year-old loudmouth and one-time convicted felon who paid in excess of $200 million for a team that can barely tie its shoelaces without whining and kvetching and losing. Yeeech. Baseball stinks. So let A-Rod play for the Dominican Republic. At least in Latin American countries, the sport still means something. Here, it means … skyboxes.

Even thirty years ago, boxing was one of the three dominant sports, with the heavyweight champ being one of the two or three most famous people on earth. Now boxing is less popular than poker on television. Baseball is going that way too — not for any of those old-timey reasons, like it’s slow or good athletes are going into basketball or people like the violence of football. It’s going south because a sport that seemed nearly impossible to fix turns out to have been fixed one person at a time, and that kind of corruption eats away at the essence of what it means to be a fan.

NFL football is, without a doubt, the greatest sport in the world. I am a little concerned about FIFA soccer, as while the international competitions are as stirring as ever, the falsely-named Champions League – are there really three Premiership champions? – has significantly reduced the importance of league championships while forcing the top teams to play far too many games.

The football season, with all its inherent violence, is meant to be an endurance contest. A season of the beautiful game should not be.


Modern dentistry

… is simply awesome. After a life free of cavities, the dentist warned me last year that I had developed some decay on a few teeth in back. I spent a little over an hour watching Caddyshack on the ceiling TV while the dental team drilled away, and thanks to the topical Novocaine or whatever it was, the only problem was trying not to crack up while Ty Webb was stabbing Lacy Underall with the acupuncture needle.

(By the way, Lacy was really, really hot in a poor man’s Morgan Fairchild way. What happened to her? She was much prettier than any of the Brat Pack girls, and it’s not like any of them could act, either.)

The other great thing is that the fillings are white and you can’t see them even if you are looking for them, so there’s none of that mouth full of black holes thing going on. The bad news, however, is that the dentist decided that since it went so well, we might as well take care of three teeth that were borderline last time this afternoon.

Once more into the breach, dear friends….