Greatness encapsulated

The epic wit and wisdom of Charlie Sheen:

“I’m not bi-polar, I’m bi-winning. I win here and I win there.”

“I’m gonna say this. It’s a polygamy story. All my guy friends are gonna like throw tomatoes at me. It’s like an organic union of the hearts. Together, it’s like, it’s on.”

“I’m different. I have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart. I got tiger blood, man. Dying’s for fools, dying’s for amateurs.”

“I’m tired of pretending I’m not special. I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars.”

“I have a disease? Bullshitt. I cured it… with my mind.”

“I have defeated this earthworm with my words – imagine what I would have done with my fire-breathing fists.”

“My fangs are dripping tiger blood.”

I have to say, I am totally with him on the tedium of false modesty. And forget Two-and-a-half Men. In these latter days of Survivor: Dancing with the Teen Mom Idol Chef, how in the name of all that is pure win does Charlie Sheen not have a reality show?

It’s a crime, it’s a tragedy. Not a single tiger’s blood pearl that drops from those cocaine-encrusted lips should be lost to posterity.

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